Not Afraid Anymore

“I’m not afraid anymore!” – Kevin McAllister (Home Alone, 1990)

      It may seem like a mundane quote, said by a fictional character in a movie, but it’s more than that to me. I grew up watching Home Alone, and over the years, this quote came to mean something to my Mom and me. It may have started as a joke, I don’t remember the specifics, but I do know that before long it was our go-to phrase when we conquered something we feared. Lately, this phrase has invaded my life. I say invaded, and that may seem negative, or harsh, but that isn’t how I mean it at all. It’s a positive. I’m not afraid to be myself. Could it be the anxiety medicine kicking ass, and doing what it’s supposed to? Sure, that’s probably a huge part of it. Also, though, I feel like I’ve cut my restraints and freed myself. And I’ll tell you how I did it.

     I started an Instagram account. No, not for me. My Instagram has been active for a while, although I’ve never been brave or dedicated enough to consistently post. This account is for my Chihuahua-mix dog, named Bode. He wears bow-ties. And it’s mostly written from his perspective, except for the occasional book quote. I read to him, he knows things, it makes sense. Anyway, his account has been active for about three weeks, and I’ve already posted sixty-ish pictures, that unravel the journey of his life and adventures so far. It makes me smile, and hopefully makes other smile too.

     After Bodie’s Instagram account, I started a blog, again, from his perspective. So far, he’s laid the foundation for how he came to be the integral part of a family, and he’s given a review on a particularly interesting treat. Look it up, (Bodie Goodboy) if reading this peaks your interest. 

     Anyway, the point is, creating/managing these accounts has gotten me used to daily posts, and I’ve found that I look forward to doing it. Through it, I’ve begun to become unafraid of any creative pursuit. I want to put myself out there. I want to tell my story, and the stories that play out in my head. And, the truth is, I don’t care what other people think. I’m doing what I love, and if I love it, then there has to be others that will enjoy it.

     I’m carving my creative path in the cement, and this is the beginning of the trail.

     Be back soon,

     Ashley (Fictional Tortoise)